Smells Like Yukon Flog

Smells Like Yukon is pleased to announce that Caption Contest #10 has now received an entry from a second contestant: “I would scratch my butt if I could put this dog down.”

At the same time, Smells Like Yukon is sorry to announce that the contributor used the word “butt” rather than the more acceptable “ass.”

We must say, the overwhelming interest in the current contest is certainly gratifying, especially considering the amount of time we had to spend around model Thane Phillip’s crotch in order to doctor the image to the high standard that is no doubt evident in the finished product.

Keep your entries coming! You have nothing to gain–and nothing to lose ass your time!

Okay, so maybe we were too hasty in our assumption that the City of Whitehorse wouldn’t be overly receptive to our submission to its Gameswear Where? Gallery. We just received the following auto-reponse to our e-mail, and we think you’ll agree that it’s VERY encouraging:

“Your photos will be posted to our website shortly. Be sure to check out http://www.whitehorse.ca to see where we wear our games wear!!”

Please note the double-whammy punctuation at the end of the message. This gives us every reason to feel optimistic that the photo will soon appear in the City’s official gallery, thereby making the Subvert Smells Like Yukon Alternative Gameswear Where? Gallery a redundant exercise. It’s a real shame, in a way. The group on Flickr is now up to two members and we were expecting some great things from at least one of them.

Of course, if it turns out that our hopes are dashed by ruthless City censors, it’ll be back to the original plan.

Urban Yukon founder and Subvertian Geof Harries will pleased to know that Smells Like Yukon has finally figured out what the hell Flickr is and created an alternative to the City of Whitehorse’s clunky and staid Gameswear Where Gallery. With this entry, we’re now 1/12th of the way towards matching the City’s collection.

Details can be found here.

Smells Like Yukon’s Caption Contest #10 is off to a great start thanks to the supremely confident “Chairman Meow” from the mysterious Cat Liberation Army of Whitehorse. He or she got the ball (of wool?) rolling this morning with four solid entires, including the following:

“Sales associate to pet supplies…” (This repeats every 2.5 minutes for ten minutes until the guy just drops the dog and walks away.)

Makes you wonder if someone had a bad trip to the Phillipines, er, the Canadian Tire store in Whitehorse.

With four entries from outside sources already in the bag, it looks like Smells Like Yukon’s internal caption writing team will enjoy a rare month off. They will be reassigned to figuring out what, exactly, the Cat Liberation Army of Whitehorse is, and erasing all evidence ofthe video that may or may not have prompted the formation of this radical group. We just hope they have renounced violence.

We’re also pleased to announce the winner of Caption Contest #9: our very own graphic designer, J.D. Sparkles. Judging services were provided by Michael Pealow, who submitted the only other entry. “Oh, yours [J.D. Sparkle’s] is definitely the superior caption,” he wrote in his decision, before offering thanks for the runner up prize that will be coming his way as soon as he tells us how to get it to him. It’s a one-of-a-kind bumper sticker and it looks like this:

Stay tuned.

Well, the results from the Smells Like Yukon poll about how to make Whitehorse more hip are finally in, and the overwhelming weight of opinion points towards a clothing optional policy on the Waterfront Trolley as the best bet. That sounds pretty scary, especially if the policy is extended to tourists. Let me tell you, sitting in an RV for 275 days a year does NOT do a body good, especially when that body belongs to a 70 year-old shuffle-boarding slob from the American sunbelt. Thank God at least a few respondents had the good sense to agree that blinging up Mayor Buckway would be the less stomach-churning option for enhancing Whitehorse’s street cred within the global village of cool.

In conjunction with this morning’s broadcast of the most recent segment, “The Barstools of Utopia,” Smells Like Yukon’s polling department has now turned its attentions to the daunting challenge of making a roadmap to Yukon as utopia. Or, Yutopia, if you prefer.

As usual, there are a whole bunch of options for you to choose from. But we’re also issuing an appeal for fans of Smells Like Yukon–and, even more so, people who think it’s stupid–to send in their suggestions for addition to the list of options, for which there is apparently no limit. The main reason, in case you’re interested, is because Smells Like Yukon co-producer Mark Koepke, who gets tired of having to come up with all the options, has no one but himself to blame when they really suck. And if you know anything about Mark, you know that he’d rather blame someone else.

Suggestions can be submitted through the comment form for this entry or by e-mail using the link on the poll page of Smells Like Yukon.

Does the Yukon’s climate leave nothing to be desired? Would the territory be better if there were more double decker buses? What if an NHL franchise relocated to Whitehorse? These are just a few of the questions Jesse and Mark ask in the next segment of Smells Like Yukon, when they hit the “road to Yutopia” to determine whether or not the Yukon is the ideally perfect state.

As usual, the segment is scheduled to air on CBC Yukon the first Wednesday of the month, sometime between 7:00 a.m. and 7:30 a.m. PST. Just in case there’s any doubt, that would be tomorrow… Wednesday, November 7th. If necessary, you can use the link on the Smells Like Yukon homepage to hear tomorrow’s segment live on CBC’s internet radio.

As usual, the official Smells LikeYukon website will be updated with content related to the new segment. Online features include music details, audio outtakes, behind the scenes gossip, and a bunch of other stuff. As of today, the previous segment, “Hip Check,” is now available to members of the Smells Like Yukon Members Club for online listening.

In the meantime, we highly recommend that you take this last opportunity to vote in our current online poll about the best way to make Whitehorse even hipper. Voted once or twice already? We don’t care… and neither does the polling software, which lets you vote as often as you want. It was probably designed by U.S. Republicans.

If voting in some pointless poll doesn’t appeal to you, why not take a stab at the caption contest? Actually, there are a lot of reasons not to. For starters, a late-breaking entry by a member of the Urban Yukon community has decreased the odds of the next entry winning the grand prize from 100% to 50%. If it’s any consolation, the grand prize totally sucks.

Of course, you can always peruse the usual smattering of updated news, unbecoming events, free store donations, and online video clips and other features on the Smells Like Yukon website.