The idea for "Yukonnaise"—the sauce and the Smells Like Yukon segment—was hatched back in the spring of 2008. At first, the plan was to create a truly delicious sauce called Yukonnaise, claim it as our own, then rub our triumph in the face of Yukon's Francophone community (though not, like, literally). However, we had difficulties recruiting a local chef who was willing to cook for spite, which eventually forced us to take the story in a much more heartwarming direction by creating Yukonnaise as a gift to the Francophone community. At some point, this seemed like an ideal story for a Christmas "special." We'd never done one of those before.

The "improv" production of Yukonnaise was pretty straightforward. Our Franco-culinary ringer Stephane Aucion joined Jesse and Mark in Mark's kitchen for a fairly disorganized cooking session on Sunday, December 7. Basically, we just let the recorder run while we figured out how to throw the saucy condiment together. All in all, it probably took two hours to bring our very purple concoction to a point where we were ready to taste it. As soon as we tasted it, there was no doubt that this was Smells Like Yukon's greatest culinary achievement since we revealed the recipe for a half-baked community monument.

The recipe, for anyone inclinded to try this at home, is reproduced below. For best results, it is VERY IMPORTANT to follow the recipe exactly.

Yukonnaise

All quantities approximate.

• Heat some oil in a frying pan. Any kind of oil will do. Motor oil not recommended.
• Throw a bunch of chopped cooking onions into the oil.
• Toss some ground moose in with the onions. (If unavailable, subsititute moose steaks or moose roast.)
• Squirt some Aunt Jemima Syrup (Original) and French's Dijon Mustard (no substitutions) into a mixing bowl. Mix by hand.
• Combine fried moose/onion mixture and Aunt Jemima/French's Dijon mixtures in a food processor. Add cranberries, sage, egg yolks and secret ingredient (Worcestire sauce). Let 'er rip.
• Bring purple mixture to a boil.
• Serve on a lovely bed of Yukon Gold potatoes. (Do NOT serve on Yukon Gold beer.)

If the recipe doesn't entice you, then you really need to see the sauce for yourself. That does not mean you should show up at Mark's house; it means you should click here.

Sadly, the post-production and overdub sessions weren't nearly as fun as the actual cooking. You may recall hearing Miss Piggy of Muppet fame at about the 4:43 mark of "Yukonnaise" (the segment, not the sauce.) It has always been a dream of ours to work with this talented performer, but our illusions were shattered pretty quickly once we got her into the studio. Let's just say that every unflattering thing you've ever read about her is probably true. She's a spoiled diva. And if you don't believe us, just ask the High Country Inn what she did to their Presidential Suite.

In all likelihood, the Miss Piggy experience would have marked the low point for this segment—had we not resorted to some local amateur talent to overdub the sound of a grocery store cashier requesting a "Price check on cheese curds!" You'd think it would be a pretty simple task for someone to speak these words into a paper towel tube pointed at a handheld recorder without losing her composure in front of a roomful of people.... The extended outtake "Cheese please" seems to prove otherwise.

(Posted December 24, 2008)